Another day of fatshaming

So today I realised one of my contact had shares this video:

I was infuriated to say the least.
So the best way they could direct this was in fatphobic fashion that not only demonises being fat and is based on stereotypes but also reinforces fatshaming?
There are plenty of constructive ways to promote a healthy lifestyle and this isn't one of them.
This reminds me of the saying "if you don't wanna get STD's don't have sex."
Fear mongering. 
Utterly ridiculous and insulting.

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We have been conditioned to feel ashamed for not looking 'perfect,' even though 'looking perfect' holds an utterly subjective meaning.

My first ever ASOS plus size/curve order!

I was very skeptical towards online shopping for clothes, especially as a plus size lady.
I was worried I wouldn't be able to find anything my size, and that especially when it came to trousers I'd be unable to fit in the largest size.

Oh, how wrong was I!

Before I begin I'd like to give you an idea of my size and shape. I have tights size 18 and 20 from Primark, and I can fit in dresses size 18, but nowadays more comfortably in dresses and skirts size 20.
However, I could never fit into any trousers in Primark or anything with a skinny fit. Their sizes go up to 20 only anyway. My height is 165cm (5'5).

Recently I tried some Marks & Spencer jeans in size 24. They fit me, but it wasn't a comfy fit.

So, I came to the conclusion that my top is an entirely different size from my bottom.
Little did I know that I need different sizes in tops, shirts, skirts, jeans and trousers altogether. So basically, depending on my body part, I can fit into 5 different sizes.

My body shape is pear with my hips being a lot larger than my breast area.
My bra size is 42DD.

As you can imagine, when I saw the ASOS measurements I didn't know what to make of them. My waist is an ASOS size 24, but my hips are (or I thought they were) between a size 26 and 28.

And so I decided to buy two loose trousers and a pair of jeans to test the water.

I thought it'd be a good idea to buy everything in size 26, just to be safe. Well...

Disclaimer: I do not own the pictures from Asos website, I'm just posting them here for reference.

ASOS CURVE Harem Pants with Foldover Waistband In Jersey - Black / UK 26

So, the model here wears size 18.

Size 26 is almost twice my size!!!!

I love these pants, as they're super comfy and they have pockets, but they're actually falling!!! Which is probably due to the fact there is no waistband.

I don't know if I'm going to return them as they cost 21 euros only and my mom knows how to sow, which means she can alter them to make them fit me.
If my mom couldn't fix them, I'd definitely return them though.

I'd suggest buying one or even two sizes smaller if you have a small waist and want to buy these pants.

ASOS CURVE Harem Trouser with Shirred Waist - Rose / UK 26

The model here is wearing size 18 as well.

This one isn't so bad for me, because even though it's clearly at least one size larger, the elastic waist band makes it possible to wear it and it won't fall.

I'd definitely not return this, and I actually like it's loose fit.

However, if I knew how it'd fit me before I ordered I'd have ordered size 24.

In general, I'd say stay true to your size, or order a size smaller if you want a tighter fit, but even your own size -and even a size larger- won't be too loose due to the waistband.

ASOS CURVE Farleigh Slim Mom Jeans in Prince Light Wash with Busted Knees - Blue / UK 26

The model is wearing size 18.

I'm so happy I bought size 26 on this one!
24 would probably fit me as well, but it'd be so uncomfortable!

With this one I can sit, I can bend, and I can generally be so comfy.

If you want a comfy loose fit choose a size larger than your normal size, otherwise just buy your normal size.

Final Thoughts:

I generally don't regret buying a size larger than what I suspected was my size, as it's easier to make clothes a size smaller than to make them a size larger (actually you can't).

I now know that when it comes to jeans and trousers I'm a size 24 and I could probably fit in size 22 as well -if the material is stretchy.

I hope this helps all the plus size babes with similar body types to mine!

Xoxo

Plus size stereotypes

There are so many stereotypes surrounding plus size people, it's infuriating.

More specifically, we're portrayed as lazy, stupid, boring etc.

Plus size women get mistreated by strangers who shout insults about our weight on the street, public servants who have an attitude towards us because they consider us lower beings; we get catcalled and harassed by men who think we should be happy to be violated because we won't be able to 'do better' due to our weight, we are discriminated against during interviews because employers think we may lead an unhealthy lifestyle or because they may think we're 'slow' or lazy. We're always seen as the 'fat friend' in our friend groups and social circles.

And don't even get me started on how society views and treats plus size men, how people treat them as disgusting creatures and how other men make fun of them pretending these are harmless 'man jokes.'

As a plus size woman I have a few things to say:

We're not your punching bags. Stop taking your problems out on us.
Plus size people don't exist for your aesthetic pleasure and we do not need to adhere to any of your stereotypical expectations. We also do not need to apologise for who we are and we do not owe you an explanation about our weight and lifestyle.

You have no right to make assumptions about our life and you aren't entitled to insult us and belittle us.

Plus size people come in all shapes and sizes and they can be:
Sexy, smart, professional, active, athletic, seductive, strong, beautiful, talented...

And if you can't accept that, well, that's your problem, not ours.

Funny fat girls

I see a lot of fellow fat ladies thinking they have to be funny; they have to perform all the time to blend in. And so they force themselves to do so. It seems there is this notion that since we're fat, our only option to be attractive in any way is to be funny. Nope. You don't have to feel the need to 'perform' and be 'funny' because of your weight. You are a valuable, and sexy and attractive person regardless.

There is no need to feed into a stereotype "she's not hot, but she's funny." You can be fat and hot, and if you're funny that's great as well, but you don't have to force yourself to make jokes and entertain people. And for the love of me, you don't have to make fat jokes aimed at yourself to show people you're funny; to prove you can 'fit in.' I've seen many times fat gals making fun of themselves, to the point where I wanted to cry at all the mean things there were saying. You don't have to make fun of yourselves to be cool. You don't have to use horrible and traumatising language aimed at yourself to be accepted. And if the people around you make you feel like you have to do those things, then you need to kick those people out of your life. Lastly, please, don't let movies be your example about how you should dress and behave as a fat person. Media's portrayal of fat people is inaccurate and harmful. They play into toxic cliches and stereotypes that either ostracise fat people or don't give them space to be themselves to exist in society.

This is an open letter to all the "feminists" and "activists" who have verbally abused me online:

To say that white people can never be part of a minority is extremely ignorant. Also whiteness isn't an absolute indicator of one's origins.
I'm sick and tired of people saying: "You're a straight cis white female, you have no right to talk about racism, gender etc". Guess what...
You don't know me. You have no right to make assumptions about me. You -falsely- presume what kind of person -you think- I am or what kind of experiences I have had.
Well, you guessed wrong.

The fact that in your eyes I'm a straight cis white female doesn't entitle you to mistreat me nor to shut me up.

What is whiteness? What does it represent?
Yes, I am pale as fuck. However, I come from Greece. Greece is a mediterranean/balkanian country with a variety of oriental influences. Did you know that I have been bullied for being pale because people didn't believe that I was a "real" Greek? Did you know that I received racism throughout my life for not being darker? No? Then stop making assumptions.
(When I complained to a 'feminist' page's moderators about the abuse I was receiving, they couldn't assist me because I don't come from a minority. But I'm a Greek woman living in London!)

What does being straight mean? What does it represent?
Yes, I have a boyfriend (that doesn't really tell you much about my sexual orientation btw). However, did you know that for the biggest part of my life everyone presumed I was a lesbian due to my appearance and behaviour and that I was on the receiving end of horrendous comments and behaviours?
Oh, you didn't know that? Then maybe you should stop making assumptions.

What does being cisgender mean? What does it represent?
Yes, I was born female, I look like a female and I -for the most part of it- identify as a female today. However, did you know that for a big part of my life I was suffering from gender dysphoria because I identified as gender neutral?
Oh, you didn't know that? Then maybe you should stop making assumptions then.

Moreover, apart from being straight, cis and white in your eyes, you should also see I am fat (as it's not very easy to hide that anyway).
Do you know how much fat phobia and fat shaming I had to put up with? Or maybe you choose to ignore this, you choose to ignore anything that can prove that I can suffer too, despite being a "straight cis white female".

Something that no one ever thinks about and no one mentions:
I have been suffering from mental illness since I was a child. Do you have any fucking clue what that means? The trauma, the confusion, the tremendous difficulties in surviving as a person who suffers from mental illness.
But I guess you presumed I'm mentally healthy because as a "straight cis white female" I have no right to suffer, right? Well, guess again.

I'm not saying that I haven't benefitted from white privilege. I'm not saying I haven't benefitted from passing as cis. I do acknowledge those facts. Nevertheless, to demean and devalue my whole life because of that, when you don't know what I had to go through is atrocious.
Especially when it's coming from so called "feminists" and "activists".
You don't know my story, so stop making assumptions about it.

Lastly, I shouldn't have to explain myself. I don't owe you my private information. I don't owe you my story to justify your respect.
You should respect me as I have respected you.

I have been on the receiving end of so much verbal abuse through pages that supposedly fight oppression that my mental health was put in jeopardy. I decided to step back from any hate filled page disguising to be about equality. Maybe some of you mistake equality for revenge.

Lara.

Personal trainer calling fat people "repulsive"

There has been a video circulating around the internet of a personal trainer calling fat people "repulsive".

Now as a fat person myself I have a few things to say:

-You have no right to insult fat people as a whole. 
-If you find that fat people aren't aesthetically pleasing that is your personal view and your problem, so don't try to make it our problem.
-Stop concern trolling. We know you give no shits about our health and you're using it as an excuse to insult us.
-It's none of your fucking business how much we weight.
-It's not of your fucking business what and how much we eat. We're not eating your food ffs.
-Not all fat people eat unhealthily.
-Some fat people do run, go to the gym, swim etc.
-Some fat people don't exercise and it's their right not to. It's up to them, not up to you.
-Just because we're fat that doesn't give you the right to make assumptions about our lifestyle.
-Condemning people who eat unhealthily can also be classism as not everyone can afford to pay to eat healthy.
-Some people can't lose weight. Yes, they can't even if they try.
-Fat people aren't lazy. People's weight is irrelevant to them being lazy.
-Fat people owe you no explanation. The fact that you feel entitled to question us on our eating habits or lifestyle shows your thin privilege and your rudeness.
-Not every fat person wants to lose weight. And they shouldn't have to if they don't want to.
-There are fat people who love their bodies.
-You CAN be fat and happy.
-You CAN be fat and healthy.

Lastly, if you still think you have the right to insult us, or any other right on us, you can fuck off.

No Body Shame Campaign

People should stop judging others by their size. It's none of your business man. If you don't like it look the other way.

Also ffs women be nice to each other!
Most of the pressure towards women being skinny comes from other women, not men!!!!!

I have been asked many times how can I be so confident, being a curvier girl and all.
It's because:
1. I don't care what others think
2. I don't compare myself to others, everyone is special, different and unique
3. I know people are not perfect and don't try to be perfect or fit in any stereotypes
4. I think everyone can be sexy and also do believe curves can be sexy too
5. I only wear what makes me feel good and never compromise to a stylistic choice that won't suit my aesthetics just because of my body type
6. I know anyone who tries to bully me, attack me or judge me for my weight is probably a mean person with no life, low self esteem, and personal issues -coz why would you try to make someone feel bad otherwise?
7. I fucking love myself and would clone me and fuck me if I could

So please, never ever ever feel ashamed! No matter how much you weight, how tall you are, your skin colour, whether you have scars or other marks on your body... NEVER feel like there's something wrong with the way you look!

Check this incredible site:

No Body Shame Campaign