I'm an artist

I've been thinking lately about my career and its future.

I've got a BA in Music and an MA in Community Arts. It goes without saying that it's impossible to find a job in those fields unless you got really good connections -which I don't- or are a member of some sort of union -which I'm not and I cannot afford to be.

Thing is, I've always been told in my life that art can never be my main income. I've always been told it can only be a hobby and the very few who manage to make good money out of it and/or make a decent living are the exceptions.

So, what am I supposed to do?
Everytime I've tried a 'normal' job so far, I've felt extremely uncomfortable and a few times it even had an impact on my health.
You see, I thrive in creative environments and I wither in non creative, boring ones.

Ask me to come up with ideas, concepts, lyrics, stories, melodies, scripts, directive advice, designs, images, vocals (and anything artistic) and I will do so in no time.
I don't have to squeeze my brain to be creative, as creativity is my natural instinct, perception and way of thinking.

However, put me in a non creative job, and even though I can excel in it, I'll be depressed and stressed af. (hint: which is what's going on atm)

It's so fucking unfair that there aren't many opportunities for artists and creative people to make a living working within the arts unless they have connections. Some of us are introverts and cannot physically be 'sociable.' Also, when you make it compulsory for people to be part of unions to work in the arts you're excluding those of us who don't have the money and resources to do so.

I got two fucking degrees in the arts and so far I have not been able to find a job where I can put my degrees and creativity in use. And it's beyond frustrating. I'm going to be 30 in a year and a half, and I still don't know what I'm doing with my life.

You know what: I'm not a 'normal' person and I can't be a 'productive' and 'useful' member of society (the way most people perceive those).

I'm a fucking artist. And I cannot but only be that which I am.

Fuck it.

Plus size stereotypes

There are so many stereotypes surrounding plus size people, it's infuriating.

More specifically, we're portrayed as lazy, stupid, boring etc.

Plus size women get mistreated by strangers who shout insults about our weight on the street, public servants who have an attitude towards us because they consider us lower beings; we get catcalled and harassed by men who think we should be happy to be violated because we won't be able to 'do better' due to our weight, we are discriminated against during interviews because employers think we may lead an unhealthy lifestyle or because they may think we're 'slow' or lazy. We're always seen as the 'fat friend' in our friend groups and social circles.

And don't even get me started on how society views and treats plus size men, how people treat them as disgusting creatures and how other men make fun of them pretending these are harmless 'man jokes.'

As a plus size woman I have a few things to say:

We're not your punching bags. Stop taking your problems out on us.
Plus size people don't exist for your aesthetic pleasure and we do not need to adhere to any of your stereotypical expectations. We also do not need to apologise for who we are and we do not owe you an explanation about our weight and lifestyle.

You have no right to make assumptions about our life and you aren't entitled to insult us and belittle us.

Plus size people come in all shapes and sizes and they can be:
Sexy, smart, professional, active, athletic, seductive, strong, beautiful, talented...

And if you can't accept that, well, that's your problem, not ours.