The Song

Do you ever listen to a song that reminds you of someone

– Maybe a song they loved –

To feel close to them?

To get a glimpse of a memory, a moment you were happily together?

Do you ever listen to a song that reminds you of someone

– Maybe a song you enjoyed listening to together –

And break down in tears?

Because you know that the music they loved is the only thing you have left of them?

Do you ever listen to a song that reminds you of someone

– Maybe your song –

And feel your heart being ripped out of your chest?

Because every time you listen to it, you realise you’re one step closer to losing them forever?

Uroboros

The same thing

Repeating and re-repeating until something changes,

But nothing changes;

Stagnant, it all remains the same

Painfully obvious and against us

(01-2022. Inspired by scroll 1 (1996) by Carolee Schneeman)

Walk a mile in my shoes

I wrote this poem today, self-isolation and people not taking this pandemic seriously has affected my mental health.

Here is part of it:

“Depression is not showering for a week

Depression is not having the strength to be

Depression is a pile of negative emotion

Depression is a misunderstood notion”

“Depression can be a never-ending nightmare

Depression can be a monster you can’t bare

Depression isn’t a mainstream movie trend

Depression is not recognising any friend”

By Charles Baudelaire

"Aux objets répugnants nous trouvons des appas"

(In repulsive objects we find enticing lures)

- Au Lecteur, Fleurs Du Mal

(To the Reader, The Flowers of Evil)

Little Lizard

Less than a couple of hours ago I thought I had saved a little lizard from two stray cats. Its tail was cut off and it had a scratch on the side. I put it in a safe place in the garden, only to find out that ants were eating it an hour later. I was very shaken and sad by the fact that I couldn't save it, but even more so by the fact that it was suffering prior to its death. This is a poem I wrote for it:

"Poor little lizard, what an awful way to dieHe cut your tail and he scratched your side

I tried to save you; I failed, tell me why?
My heart is broken, distraught; I saw you die

I hoped you didn’t suffer; I want to say goodbye
Your last moments were painful; I wish it was a lie

I wish I’d been more helpful, I wish I’d saved your life
I’m now mourning your death, tears running from my eyes

I thought you would survive this, but then I saw the ants
Devouring your small body, approached you really fast

I’ll give you a proper burial, I know you had a soul
I’m sorry I couldn’t save you from this unfair downfall"

Rest in peace little lizard...

Diarrhoea

My first poem for 2018! (can't we all relate after we ate like elephants during the holiday season?)

Diarrhoea diarrhoea
My anus fears ya
My anus fears ya
Damned to meet you
Got to greet you?
Don't wanna feel you
Gotta escape you

Diarrhoea diarrhoea
I cannot take you
I hate you, I hate you
Intestines protesting
Bowel movement protecting
Sphincter exhaustion
Shitty explosion

Halloween Song

Happy Halloween! 🔮⚰👻🎃

Here's part of my song 'Halloween Song' to celebrate:

"I think there is a ghost in my room

During the night it wanders

Dancing shadows creepy sounds are on the loose

I can see outside my window shining spiders

In my room there is a spot that feels too cold

Even when the heating works full power

What I’ll tell you might seem bold

But sometimes I feel I’m not alone

Even when in my room there is no other

Creepy, freaky little sounds

Make my heart pound even faster

I’m a helpless little mouse

Waiting for my own disaster"

And here's a LINK to the video of me performing it a long time ago!

Neverland

Since it was my birthday the other day, I decided to gift you a snippet of a poem I wrote about a month ago.

For the past few years I get pre-birthday melancholy during the month of my birthday, October (which is funny considering it's also my favourite month and I love Halloween, but hey! I'm a walking contradiction).

And so, here it is -partly:

'Neverland'

"Life’s already sad and boring; you’re not even thirty-one

Now you have to be so careful, and to bring food to the table

Pay those bills, have a career, and no option to give up

Always pretending you know what you’re doing, heart shut

Rude awakening leaves you wishing you were Peter Pan

Always young, forever young, eternal youth in Neverland"

Wisdom Tooth Poem

Another day of rice and soup, fuck you, damn you, wisdom tooth

My tooth doesn't hurt as much no more, But I have to be careful not to make it sore

Fuck you, damn you, wisdom tooth, I want mozzarella sticks to tell the truth

Just a fracture of today's thoughts . . . (II)

"Time is passing by

Looking through my window

Leafs are turning brown

I am now a widow

Lost my heart and soul

To this tough reality

Trying to write a song

Doom, despair, fatality"